Yes I am Jealous

Why am I jealous you ask., it's because...

I see the pictures of everyone else's high schoolers celebrating homecoming.

I see all the moms getting their boys ready for homecoming with their ties and fancy shirts, and taking pictures with their dates and friend groups.

I see everyone sending their kids to school and not worrying about what is happening during the school day.

I see spouses getting to go on a "date night" without worrying if their child will need to go to the bathroom.

I see people getting into places without evening thiniking about stairs and how to get my son into the building.

I see my youngest upset because I say no but he doesn't see the behind the scenes worry I keep locked up.

Tonight was a lot to process for me as a mom of a high schooler, If you are a mom, I am sure you have thought about the days your child would grow up, date and go to a school dance. In all honesty , it''s hard to see all the pictures on Facebook etc of kids Wyatt's age going to the homecoming dance.

Wyatt thought about going to the dance this year but decided his anxiety would be too much to even try to attend (he decided the night before the dance).. As much as I wanted to say you should just go and have a good time; I had to remind myself what I want is not what is best for him. I need to remember he knows what he can handle.

So tonight, instead of going to HHS homecoming, he watched half of the LSU vs Auburn game with the "adults" for a bit and was in bed before the dance even started. Wyn left us to go to a friends house.

I wish I could feel something different besides jealousy but at almost 11pm (the ending time of the dance) a part of me wishes I was in the pick up line to get Wyatt and that Wynston was in the car with me waiting to hear how the night went. But you can't always get what you want ....so instead I'm watching the story of Jeffery Dahmer with a glass of cabernet, Patrick is in his chair snoring away, Wyatt is sleeping with Wrigley in his bed, and Wynston is at a friend's house. Life is good and seriously I am so thankful for all that I have.